Tuesday, January 11, 2011

waiting

I am 40 weeks and 5 days pregnant.

Little Abby seems quite content living inside my full-term belly. As of this moment, i still have yet to experience a single contraction, or any signs of labor for that matter. How can this be? I knew she probably wouldn't arrive "on time," so to speak, but i wasn't prepared to not be feeling anything in the meantime!

More than that, i wasn't prepared for the roller coaster of emotions that comes along with waiting for your own baby to be born. I've been told that the weeks following delivery can be quite messy as far as emotions go, but no one told me that the weeks preceeding delivery can be similar.

I am weepy. I'm excited. I'm frustrated. I'm nervous. I'm ready. Sometimes, i'm all of these things all at once. And that makes for a very difficult wait.

She could be here at any moment of any day, and yet that moment seems so far away. Where is our little girl? I don't want to rush her, but i'm so, so anxious to see her face! I try to picture it, but i can't. Finally getting to see what she looks like is going to be the best surprise either of us will ever know. Getting to hold her, touch her, smell her, kiss her, love her. Getting to know her - our daughter, the third member of our family.

Tonight we are scheduled for a fetal non-stress test at the hospital where she will be born. After that, we will see our midwife. Seems like the perfect time to go into labor, doesn't it? But as we've realized, babies have no sense of time. They will come when they're ready, and that's all there is to it. And no amount of ice cream or dancing or bribery is going to make them change their minds.

Still...i am hopeful. :)

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me

My name is Audrey. I'm just a twentysomething learning how to master the arts of cooking, cleaning, working and being in a relationship, same as you.In between all that, I like to collect sea glass and salvaged furniture. Occasionally, I cut and paste scraps of paper together. In the end, I am hoping that all of these things together will somehow amount to something good. This blog is a journal of my efforts to get there.

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thesalvagedbride at gmail dot com

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